Vote in This Week's Poll: What's your body image?
Monday December 1, 2008
As we talked, Betsy mentioned that she never criticized her daughter, but she did criticize herself in front of her daughter. "I wonder if she's picking up on that and mimicking me?"
One thing is certain and that is our kids look up to us and they notice what we do and say. If we tell them to love their bodies but don't love our own bodies, they pick up on that and may also pick up our negative behaviors.
That leads me to the question about body image, something we all struggle with from time to time. I'm curious about you - do you love your body and feel good in your own skin, or are you more like Betsy? Vote in this week's poll and then leave a comment to tell us your experiences with body image.
More Resources
Comments
my older sister is obsessed about her body and during my last visit I heard my 8 year old nephew saying that he was on a diet cause he didnt want to get fat and before he chose to eat anything that weekend he wanted to know the fat content. I was pretty annoyed with my sister at that point. There wasnt anything I could do but it definetly made me realize that kids pick up on these things and adults should be a more careful about their obsession with being skinny rather than just being healthy.
I have two daughters, 15 & 13 and I have noticed both of them checking the nutritional facts on items before they chose them as snacks. I was alarmed at first that my obsession with my weight loss may be effecting their perception of themselves, but after talking to them about why they look for calorie and fat intake I know they want to eat healthier too. They don’t know it but they have been for two years because of the way I have changed my cooking habits. My 13 year old has been in the same size jeans for over a year and my 15 year has actually lost a size. They are very positive an confident about the way they look and I think it is because I lost over 50 pounds the right way, eating healthy and excercising and they see this as a a healthy lifestyle for all of us.
I hate the term “diet”. It’s all about having a healthy nutrition plan and understanding how to eat good tasting food in a healthy manner. I worked with a trainer for 2 years and had to basically reprogram my brain on how to eat. I was eating healthy food for the most part but I wasn’t eating certain things at the right times of the day and was only eating twice a day. That made a huge difference in my body weight, and thus my body image.
I think it’s important that our children learn how to eat healthily early on and learn what things to watch for. To me, it’s as important as learning how to spell and calculate. I don’t think schools spend enough time teaching this to our kids. We’re the country with a weight problem so let’s be pro-active about it. It’s all in how the subject is approached.
I don’t have children and I look okay for my age. I know I need to tighten up and I know I need to eat better at times. I try to pick healthy choices but a few days before grocery shopping we were really low on food so I only had two meals on those days and I was exhausted. I need to take care of myself since I an a kidney transplant survivor.
I’m not happy with the way my body looks by any means, but I do think I have the ability to look nice, when I want to. My husband left me because of how I look, despite the fact I wear mostly Ralph Lauren, so it’s not like I look skanky all of the time. I always thought if he didn’t like the way I looked, he should be supportive and helpful in trying to help me make a change. I guess he just thought if you can’t do it by yourself than too bad. What a jerk. I guess if he were overweight, I would love him regardless and do whatever I could to help him make a change for bettering himself. So in a round about way, I’m saying I’m happy in my own skin. I know I need to make a change and I try diligently to do so. But I don’t think anyone should be judged based on the amount of weight they carry. I have spent 3/4 of my life @ 120 lbs and now weigh twice that. I’ve seen both sides. When will the world wake up and start looking at what’s inside instead of assuming they know everything about someone because of what they see on the outside. The old addage that your body reflects how you feel on the inside is not accurate. Do I wish I was still 120? Hell yeah. Am I going to work to get back there? Probably. Am I happy with my life in general? Absolutely and I”m physically healthy in every sence but that. So who cares what other people think? I think the only reason they comment, is to hide their own short comings. That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it!
I spent half my life being overweight..at 14 I weighed 230#..always trying this or that with little to no change..what happened? At the age of 49 I decided to once and for all get serious about my health, the way I ate, the way I worked out..the way I looked…joined a gym, am there 5 to 6 days a week..it is such a rush..don’t really care what anybody else thinks..but it is what I think..and I choose to not be overweight.
My daughter is stick thin as I was at her age. She has a great self image. She eats well and has lots of snacks throughout the day. We don’t count calories here, just make healthy options available.
She see’s me lift weights regularly and finally she’s getting into doing some push ups herself :). I would like to see her a bit stronger than she is and hopefully my example will help her get there.
While I am not happy with my current figure, I accept the way I look right now and love and respect myself. I am working on losing the 40 pounds I have gained in the last few years, but if I were to obsess over it I would never be happy. It is better to accept who we are and be happy then to constantly criticize ourselves and be miserable.
The first year on the treadmill, I lost the fat in the legs. I added upper body exercises to include light weights, and the upper body has firmed up with substantial added muscle mass the last two years. I am about to turn 63 yrs old, but I feel like a 20 yr old as far as energy and strength. I like the trim look, but it’s the physical improvement that has me hooked. For me, there is no end-goal, just the journey. First, looking forward to a workout. Second, the sense of being alive, feeling the heart, lungs, muscles work, pounding out the sweat during a workout. Last, the profound sense of well-being after a workout, and the mental resolve in all of it.
As Paige indicates, children will bear the brunt of what their parents teach them. Children will also absorb and mimic their parent’s proclivities and foibles without explicitly being told to follow their example. The thing is to encourage children as soon as they are capable of language and concepts, to think for themselves. Ask them for their opinion, and show appreciation for it. Letting our kids know when we’ve made a mistake or what we’re doing is not appropriate for them will help. Having a good self-image is vital to our own mental health. Helping the young develop a healthy self-image is just as important.
The important thing for us is to embrace who we are, and just do the best we can.
It is all about loving and respecting yourself. Don’t pay any mind to what other people think/say. No matter what your size/shape, there will be haters.
It’s been a long battle but I finally have a positive attitude about the way I look. I understand how to eat healthy and the importance of exercise. I did my best to pass that on to my kids as they were growing up because I believe it is important to present a good example. I’m know there were times when I wasn’t happy about the way I looked and I’m sure my daughter especially picked up on that. The most important thing I tried to instill in both of my children is the importance of good nutrition and exercise as being key to a healthy life style. Obesity is definitely an issue in this country with both children and adults. As adults we have a responsibility to our children to set a good example of a healthy lifestyle which includes promoting a positive attitude about ourselves. Maybe easier said than done 100% of the time but true none-the-less.
My belief is that good health is both physical and mental/ emotional. I’ve always felt overweight, no matter what my actual weight. In fact, I have looked back at photos from high school on, and wondered what made me so dissatisfied with my body? I looked fine. I believe it is important to eat well + healthy, exercise and try to live a healthy lifestyle. Hopefully, that would include being in a healthy weight range for your height. I know, after recently losing almost 25 pounds, that I look and feel better than I have in a long time. That said, feeling comfortable in your skin is something everyone deserves to feel, and it has more to do with healthy self image, than actual weight. Be kind to yourself, and love yourself enough to accept yourself, and love yourself enough to eat well and work out.
As child I wished I was more handsome and more importantly more athletic. Eventually I became happy with how I looked but never did get all that coordinated, with a result that instead I did sports like hiking and running.
In my late 20’s I gained a few lbs, only about 10 or so, but they all found their way to my breasts. Believe me for a guy this can be traumatic……People teased me sometimes and I started going shirtless less often.
Eventually I joined a gym and discovered a lot of the guys there had fairly well developed breasts. But they aren’t boobs, they’re pecs. Also as men get older they seem to aquire a bit more flesh in that area generally. So it started bothering me less.
A few years ago I developed a new hobby which was playing dress up. ( I promise this isn’t going to get sexual so don’t worry) At that point I joined a web site where these things are discussed and discovered just how jealous a lot of the men there were. Accepting this aspect of my personality also helped to accept having a slightly less than manly figure
My younger duaghter has lost a lot of weight, to the point that if she loses more we may be concerned. She is 15. However a year ago she was about 20 lbs overweight, to the point that at her physical her doctor suggested she lose some weight and get more exercise. Her cholesterol was high a couple of years ago also.
I think that it’s difficult for children and teenagers to sort this all out. After all the country is having an obesity epidemic and exercise is increasingly found only in an organized venue. No more walking home from school to play ball in the street for the rest of the afternoon like when I was a kid, shortly before the discovery of fire. The sad fact is that a great many adults have to pay attention to diet and exercise in a way that was unneccesary just a few decades ago, and this has become true of kids also.
For me the issue is health rather than body image. I figure I look attractive enough. But with the emphasis on appearance and the generally unhealthy life style of people in America I’m always a bit surprised when a teenage girl doesn’t have body image issues.
America is where the rich are thin and the poor are fat. That says an awful lot about our society.
Curt
It took me a few years, but I’ve managed to lose a total of 100 pounds. I have 3 teens, my two boys can eat whatever, whenever and are both quite thin. My 17 yo daughter has gone past the “curvy” stage and is heading towards the “plump”! She has watched me in my journey to get fit, little changes in my eating habits, lots and lots of walking, using any reason to get moving, no fad diets, extreme measures, no diet foods or plans, and she knows what she needs to do to keep herself healthy. Sometimes she chooses the wrong foods at the wrong times, but I don’t stress over that. I would like to see her move her body more, and she knows that, but SHE’S comfortable in her own skin and happy and healthy so I am as well. I have to say that I don’t understand the thought process behind the phys ed requirements in the school districts in this area, so I just plug away at the walking, moving, rollerblading, here at home.