Most Annoying Fitness Phrases and Cliches
Friday June 19, 2009
A friend and I were standing in a checkout line one day, surrounded by a hundred or so magazines, and she picked up one magazine with the screaming headline: "GET YOUR BODY BIKINI-READY!"
"I hate that phrase," she said. "It's all over the place when summer starts and I'm like - why do I have to be ready for a bikini? I'd rather be ready for an emergency. I think that's the most annoying phrase ever."
As we waited, she came up with other fitness quotes, phrases and cliches that annoy her:
- 8 more! ("When my aerobics instructor says that, she's always lying.")
- Pain is weakness leaving the body ("No, it's just PAIN")
- No pain, no gain ("I gain all the time and I don't need pain to do it")
- Core training ("We all know it's just ab exercises")
- Ripped abs ("I keep picturing shredded abdominal muscles flapping in the wind...ew")
- Yo-yo dieting ("That whole phrase just needs to go")
- Does this make my butt look big? ("I have a big butt, so it looks big no matter what I wear. If you have to ask...")
Comments
Haha, yep, typical magazine headlines.
You know what also bugs me!?
The words May Could Can Might and Should
They ALWAYS use these words because if whatever they say doesn’t work, then you can’t blame them because they only said it COULD have that effect…
Chances are it wont when you read it from a magazine!
“Give it 110%!”. I hate when this is used anywhere, but especially fitness!
I get annoyed when magazine covers have headings like “Beat Your Belly Fat” and “Learn how to love your curves” on the same cover. It seems so hypocritical. Am I supposed to hate my belly or love it? I also hate the phrase “belly fat”. Weight-loss supplements use it all the time.
“Feel the burn!” That’s the last thing I want to focus on…Ouch!
sung to the theme song of Cops:
“Fat boy, fat boy whatcha going to do ?
whatcha going to do when the rolls on you ?
Well my belly won’t give me no break, weight
watchers been calling my place. Got to clean up
my plate and my belt buckle won’t stay in place. Fat
boy, fat boy watcha going to do ? whatcha going to
do when the rolls on you ?” – he he he
LOL… that was awesome Ted.
I laugh every time I see an infomercial on TV praising a revolutionary, new and improved gizmo that will allow you to lose weight without getting off your rear-end.
I get annoyed when video instructors use unrealistic goals to motivate, like:
“That’s it, let’s get the flat stomach you’ve always wanted!”
“Keep it up, and you’ll be fit and toned in no time!”
These are two promises that might be true if directed at someone who is already reasonably healthy, but when you have a long way to go, it’s just cruel. Haha.
They should say, “You’re GETTING more toned all the time” or “Keep doing these exercises, and I know you’ll see improvements.”
I like it when instructors acknowledge difficulty instead of flatly deny it. I’d rather hear “Come on, I know it’s getting tough, almost done!” than “Doesn’t this feel GREAT?! YEAH!!!” (picture the maniacal, i’m-on-crack grin.)
I get amused when fat is referred to as “stubborn” as in “Rid yourself of stubborn belly fat”. Like somehow fat is self-aware and has a stubborn personality that is purposefully trying to torment you.
“Muscle weighs more than fat” said whenever I complain I’m working hard and not losing a thing. May be true but at some point, some of that weight should come off.
lol!! as I’m reading this, there is a big ad next to the article that reads:
“Gain Flat stomach FAST!”
in my mind, i picture my stomach getting run over by a semi-truck or some cement roller… that is the fastest way i can think of!
Commercials for exercise systems like Bowflex, which I suppose are actually decent, however, they use the incredibly ripped, 7% body fat models that have obviously been working out for YEARS, and say that they guarantee “results” in only 90 days. The suggestion is, to the impressionable, is that you can achieve this body in 90 days. Yeah right…and monkeys might fly out of my butt too. And any commercial that suggests that you can “spot reduce” your abs with their revolutionary, nothing has ever been this effective, ab lounger crunch-o-matic convertible store-anywhere core pro-trainer super deluxe plus. It’s unfortunate that some people actually buy that junk…you always see it in their yard sales about a year or two later.
The phrase ‘8 more’ comes from synchronizing the moves with the music. The music helps us so we don’t lose count. It does not mean ‘the last 8′. As a fitness instructor, you have to multi-task while you teach. I would invite that lady that hates the 8 more phrase and do our job for 1 hour to see if she can, at the same time, cue, follow the music, be ready for what’s coming next, watch the participants, give safety tips, keep good form, adapt the moves according to the crowd, think about how to decompose the patterns so they can be mastered by the participants. The only thing participants need to do is to follow.
How about “I lost 50 lbs of stomach fat in a month following this one simple rule!”. I really don’t think there is “one simple rule” to loosing JUST “stomach fat”…
Ya, I have six pack abs. It’s called beer.
I HATE the mags that have “Lose 15 pounds by (whatever holiday is coming up) and then on the same cover they have pictures of cakes, brownies, cookies etc…
The ads with the flabby ugly belly actually going… blub…blub…blub… in & out makes me literally feel sick to my stomache!!! Noone should EVER to HAVE to look at that while ck-ing e-mails, etc. barf!